19a-"If, indeed, the things allotted to each of us have been divinely customized according to our ability and capacity, then for us to seek to wrench ourselves free of our schooling circumstances could be to tear ourselves away from carefully matched opportunities. To rant and to rail could be to go against divine wisdom, wisdom in which we may have once concurred before we came here. God knew beforehand each of our coefficients for coping and contributing and has so ordered our lives...."
"When in situations of stress we wonder if there is any more in us to give, we can be comforted to know that God, who knows our capacity perfectly, placed us here to succeed. No one was foreordained to fail or to be wicked. When we have been weighed and found wanting, let us remember that we were measured before and we were found equal to our tasks; and, therefore, let us continue, but with a more determined discipleship. When we feel overwhelmed, let us recall the assurance that God will not overprogram us; he will not press upon us more than we can bear (D&C 50:40)." Neal A. Maxwell BYU Devotional 10 Oct 1978
http://speeches.byu.edu/reader/reader.php?id=6197
19b-I don't know, but I don't need to know, because God knows, and that's all I need to know. --Ronald Bartholomew
19b-The Lord is not interested in maximizing efficiency but in maximizing magnificence. He could have sent Lehi out of Jerusalem the first time with Ishmael and his family and Laban's plates, but there were learning experiences that Nephi needed that came from his going back to Jerusalem twice.
19c-"With any major decision there are cautions and considerations to make, but once there has been illumination, beware the temptation to retreat from a good thing. If it was right when you prayed about it and trusted it and lived for it, it is right now. Don’t give up when the pressure mounts. Certainly don’t give in to that being who is bent on the destruction of your happiness. Face your doubts. Master your fears. 'Cast not away therefore your confidence.' Stay the course and see the beauty of life unfold for you...."
"After you have gotten the message, after you have paid the price to feel His love and hear the word of the Lord, go forward. Don’t fear, don’t vacillate, don’t quibble, don’t whine. You may, like Alma going to Ammonihah 12 , have to find a route that leads an unusual way, but that is exactly what the Lord is doing here for the children of Israel. Nobody had ever crossed the Red Sea this way, but so what? There’s always a first time. With the spirit of revelation, dismiss your fears and wade in with both feet."
Elder Jeffrey R. Holland Liahona June 2000.
http://lds.org/liahona/2000/06/cast-not-away-therefore-your-confidence?lang=eng
22a-Don't let the relief over finally making a decision about something be mistaken for feeling peace about your decision.
23b-How badly you want to change doesn't predict your success or failure...wanting it "more" doesn't help. You have to set up your environment for success (identify your "crucial moments" and plan your "vital behaviors" that will help you not succumb when you are tempting).
23b and c-Problem: bad habits feel good and good habits feel bad. The only way you can feel good about doing things that keep you from what you really want is to manipulate yourself with propaganda. Discover what you tell yourself that allows you to do bad things...that allows you to feel justified in your behavior. (example--a boss discovered that before he yelled at his employees and called them idiots and the like he would tell himself things like "they don't care enough to even try" or "if I don't threaten them they won't move.") Then take that lie and make it a truth (example: "These are human beings, not tools. or I want to be a teacher and not a tyrant or I don't care how much I've made, but in how many lives I've touched."). Write these sentences down and review them when you are in a crucial moment.
23c-Sometimes it's a skill and not a motivation problem when we are trying to change a habit. Figure out what skill you need that will help you acquire and maintain your new desired habit (example: woman smoked because she needed communication skills to get out of her circumstances)
24a-Don't eat every day as if it were your birthday. Make treats truly treats.
24c- Different foods keep us feeling full longer. Go to eatrightamerica.com and click on the ANDI (aggregate nutrient density) index to see how different foods rate.
24d-It makes a big difference to our brains what shape utensils we use. A tall thin glass makes us feel like we have had more. If the candy dish is over 6' away, you eat 1/2 as much candy as you would if it were closer. Large portions make you eat more than you wanted. Small plates and thin glasses decrease your intake.
25c-The only time you don't partake of the sacrament is when you have been told not to by an ecclesiastical leader. If you feel you shouldn't partake, then you know it's time to go and talk to your Bishop.
25c-Answers to prayers often come through other people--including prophets in General Conference.
27e-GenSmarts.com is a paid program that helps you with your research. It searches your info and gives you suggestions as to what records you need to search and where to find these records (it will give you the film number and everything).
28a-We cannot place our faith in outcomes, but must place our faith in Christ.
Esther: "But if I perish, I perish."
Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego: "Our God is able to deliver us, but if not..." (not "Our God will deliver us")
They did not place their trust in the outcomes of their trials, but in the Lord.
29b-The first thing kids need is love (nurture), but a close second is structure (guidance).
29c-It is our job as parents to help children get what they want (and experience some control in their lives) in a way in which we feel good about it. (i.e. you won't buy candy for them when you take them to the grocery story, but you will allow them to pick out a piece of fruit). Remember the thing denied is the thing craved.
29c-If you expect parenting to be convenient, you'll be disappointed.
30c-I have every choice in the world--I can seek out God's choice for me, or I can go it alone.
30c-"The Lord has placed currents of divine influence in your life that will lead you along the individual plan He would have you fulfill here on earth. Seek through the Spirit to identify it and carefully follow that direction that the Lord has put in your life. Align yourself with it. Choose, willingly, to exercise your agency to follow it. Do not be overcome by concentrating solely on today, its challenges, difficulties, and opportunities. Such preoccupations must not totally capture your attention so as to consume your life. Oh, how I would encourage you to weave deeply into the fabric of your soul the recognition that your life now is a part of a much bigger plan the Lord has for you. You lived part of it in the premortal existence. You were valiant there and came here because you wanted to grow and enjoy greater happiness. What you decide to do now will affect how well you fulfill that divine, personal plan He has for you." Elder Richard G. Scott Ensign Oct 1999 "He Lives"
http://lds.org/ensign/1999/11/he-lives?lang=eng
31a-"God help you and me that we will always so live that the Lord can answer the prayers of the faithful through us." The Teachings of Harold B. Lee, p. 129
31b-"In the end, the number of prayers we say may contribute to our happiness, but the number of prayers we answer may be of even greater importance. Let us open our eyes and see the heavy hearts, notice the loneliness and despair; let us feel the silent prayers of others around us, and let us be an instrument in the hands of the Lord to answer those prayers." Pres. Dieter F. Uchtdorf Ensign Nov 2008
http://lds.org/ensign/2008/11/happiness-your-heritage?lang=eng
32a-When you try to swap a bad habit for a good one and then fail, the problem is with your plan and not with you.
32a-To help motivate you to change...visit your "default future." What will life be life 10, 20, 30 years down the line if you don't change (finances, health and weight, etc)
32b-It doesn't matter if you were born a certain way because you can be born again.
32c-Include yourself in the "hate the sin, love the sinner" scenario.
32c- Failure = bad plan; Failure does not equal a bad person.
32c-Focus on hard work and improvement. Don't focus on character and worth (focus on what you can fix).
33b-Conditioned hypereating is a biological challenge, not a character flaw.
33b-Deprivation increases your cravings.
33c-"If you stay physically active, you're buying protection for your brain." Exercise is the key to brain health (especially in adults over 65).
33c-Self-help advice from 1833:
Doctrine and Covenants 88:124 Cease to be idle; cease to be unclean; cease to find fault one with another; cease to sleep longer than is needful; retire to thy bed early, that ye may not be weary; arise early, that your bodies and your minds may be invigorated.
33d-"It is the continuing education of our desires and the alignment of those desires with the desires of our Heavenly Father that becomes the great challenge of education for us." Neal A Maxwell
http://radiobeloved.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/neal-a-maxwell-1983-the-education-of-our-desires.pdf
33d-“You and I must take great care concerning the education of our desires.” Pres. Joseph F. Smith
34a-Lovingly let go of your children so that you don't push them to do the very thing you don't want them to do. Use your spiritual radar (the gift of the Holy Ghost) to decide when.
34b-Raising teenagers is like learning to drive a stick shift. Until you get the gas and the clutch figured out, everyone gets jerked around. Gas is freedom (they have to feel they can make choices) and the clutch is responsibility.
35a-"Plan your financial future early; then follow the plan." Ezra Taft Benson, “To the Elderly in the Church,” Ensign, Nov. 1989, 4
36a-"We must not 'let ourselves go' and become so casual—even sloppy—in our appearance that we distance ourselves from the beauty heaven has given us...."
"There are those who flippantly say: 'How I look has nothing to do with how God feels about me.' But it is possible for both earthly and heavenly parents to have unspoken disappointment in their offspring without diminished love. I say it again: Sometimes heaven blushes but loves on." Elder Douglas L. Callister "Your Refined Heavenly Home" BYU Devotional 19 Sep 2006
http://speeches.byu.edu/reader/reader.php?id=11394
36a-"Let the sisters take care of themselves, and make themselves beautiful, and if any of you are so superstitious and ignorant as to say that this is pride, I can say that you are not informed as to the pride which is sinful before the Lord, you are also ignorant as to the excellency of the heavens, and of the beauty which dwells in the society of the Gods. Were you to see an angel, you would see a beautiful and lovely creature. Make yourselves like angels in goodness and beauty." Brigham Young (DBY, 215)
36b-"Beauty must be sought in the expression of the countenance, combined with neatness and cleanliness and graceful manners. Anything is ridiculous, more or less, that is not comely." Brigham Young
36b-President David O. McKay: "It is not my purpose to discourage efforts to enhance physical beauty. When given by birth, it should be nurtured in childhood, cherished in girlhood, and protected in womanhood. When not inherited, it should be developed and sought after in every legitimate and healthful manner."
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